I went to the funeral of a great family friend this weekend; A friend that has been an enormous example to me of how to cancer with confidence. His funeral spurred a few thoughts that I can’t let go of.

Some people never get the opportunity to know that they are living in their last quarter. It changes the way you think and how you interact with the world. Many great people I know never knew when they woke up one morning that it would be the last time. In reality, almost every year life ebbs and folds into something new and we never do something that is an ingrained habit again. When you are raising kids there are many times that you help your child with something for the last time and never know it will be the last. And then there are the times when you know it will be the last: last day of kindergarten, last day of middle school, last pee wee football game.
For the last four years, I have had the opportunity to know that this could very well be my last quarter. It has changed me. I am all about the experience and opportunity. I hear people say all the time that if they had a crippling diagnosis that they would quit their life and start living. I had the opportunity to watch a couple of experts battle cancer. They never quit. They kept living their life. They kept showing up for the ordinary and it didn’t have to turn into more to be something profound. I am here to tell you that you can’t just quit everything or there will be nothing to live for. While I am more diligent with my time and my money, I still need my job. I need it for the emotional benefits as much as the financial benefits. Quite frankly, some days I feel like I need to get two or three jobs so that I can fund the adventures that I come up with in my mind. I need to feel like I am a contributor to our family and the children of the world. I am more intentional. I try to find beauty in the ordinary. I try to be consistent. I intentionally choose to spend more time with my family and I choose how to use my minutes. I try not to let opportunities pass me by. In doing so I often overdo it. Clearly, that has always been my style.
When my dad died it was sudden. However, I never heard him talk about growing old. I knew that he was one of the oldest men alive in the United States with Hemophiliac and yet, it never occurred to me that the last weekend I would ever spend time with him was an ordinary weekend in July of 2002. We were always together. We went on horse rides and spent a lot much time in the mountains. That last weekend a class reunion took me home. My dad helped me prepare for it. He sprayed all of the tables off at the park for me so they would be clean. He was glad I was home and was happy to help. Maybe he always knew it was his last quarter. Because he sure lived like that.
I wonder every day if I am doing enough. Am I teaching my children what they need to know to be the humans they were meant to be? Am I paying attention to the ordinary and consistently showing up for them? How do we know? Am I teaching the lessons they will need to know if they wake up and I am not here? I can’t imagine leaving them and yet every day I try to prepare them for it.
As we close this day, on a super hard weekend for so many in our circle, I ask you to live like it is your last quarter. Whether you are sure it is or you have no idea, if you can live with that intention, I promise it will change your life.